Monday, March 17, 2008

Zombie Killer

Fellow Warriors,

I have begun training for the inevitable! I just feel that it is my responsibility to protect my family from the impending attack of the undead! I know that there are a lot of skeptics out there that say that this is all in my head but… you know what… they said the same about Moses too and look what happened to them! THEY’RE DEAD!
My training routine so far consists of lifting weights, regular exercises smashing various melons with blunt instruments, and going on long grueling hikes. I have recently been able to convince several of my “friends” to join me on these training hikes. I know that if I told them of the coming Zombie Holocaust they would laugh and not prepare. However, I have determined that it is easer to manipulate them into participating in the training under the guise of “male bonding time”. Well… I have to go now. I have to test out the Molotov Cocktails before Amanda gets home. Until next time.

Signing off,

Grant Maloney
Zombie Killer


Cendriah said...

Say it isn’t so!

How could you do this to your mummy?


JoeSlice said...

From Wikipedia:

According to the tenets of Voodoo, a dead person can be revived by a bokor or Voodoo sorcerer. Zombies remain under the control of the bokor since they have no will of their own.

So, my suggestion (maybe this is covered) is to just befriend any local bokor/Voodoo Sorcerers. That way if there are zombies about, they probably are under control of your good friend and will pass you by.

Also, according to Sean of the Dead you can just moan and put your arms out and they think you are a zombie too. Plus double-barrelled shotguns make for action-packed fun.